Sibling Relationship
The paper will focus on my relationship with my younger brother. Having spent our entire childhood together, we had the opportunity to build a solid sibling relationship with my brother. Our relationship has been based on deep emotional connection since childhood. While we were younger, my brother would play as my advocate, protecting me from what he felt was unfair treatment from anyone. He has grown older and become my biggest cheerleader, who pushes me toward my goals. I chose the relationship with my brother because it offers an insight into how diverse individuals can coexist and maintain a good relationship. Even though we differ in gender and personal characteristics, my brother and I have maintained a healthy sibling relationship.
Factors Contributing to the Development of the Relationship
One of the factors that has contributed to the development of my relationship with my brother is proximity. Having spent most of our childhood and part of our adult life together, we had the opportunity to observe one another. As a result, we have a lot of shared experiences and understand one another better. The sense of familiarity fostered over time allows us to cope with each other’s adverse behaviors. I also believe that complementarity influences our relationship. For instance, I am more reserved in social situations, while my brother is outgoing. The relationship helps us create a balance in social dynamics.
Applying Knapp’s Model to the Relationship With My Brother
One of the components of Knapp’s relationship model applies to the relationship my brother is initiating. Impressions about one another’s existence are created in the initiating stage. While I do not have the exact recollection of when my relationship with my brother was initiated, it has grown better with time. Experimenting also applies to my relationship with my brother. As my brother grew older and was about six years old, we would play football together in the backyard. Our bond as siblings intensified once we joined the school and started sharing stories touching on personal information. However, we separated due to joining different schools and making different career choices. We may not be as connected with my brother as we used to be, but our relationship is intact.
Applying Relational Dialectics in My Relationship
My relationship with my brother is autonomous. While we value maintaining close bonds, we also recognize the need for us to maintain unique identities. While we were younger, my brother and I always wanted to spend time together. Although that may have changed, we still support each other emotionally and financially. Our separate academic and career pursuits have made the separation even more pronounced.
The Role of Language in the Relationship
One of the roles of language in my relationship with my brother is to express emotions. Maintaining healthy relationships requires using a balanced language that pays attention to other people’s needs. Using balanced language has fostered my relationship with my brother. For instance, using the ‘I’ language sounds egoistic and inappropriate in a conversation (Davis, 2019). I try to avoid making every conversation narcissistic or all about myself. Using a balanced language has helped us maintain our connection into adulthood.
Appropriate language use has also played a crucial role in resolving conflicts. Interpersonal conflicts are inevitable in any relationship, and the relationship with my brother is no exception. What matters is the response to such conflicts and the language used to find resolutions (Brower & Darrington, 2012). Conflicts allow us to explore alternative ways of doing things, hence not necessarily an unwelcome phenomenon (Brower & Darrington, 2012). We have successfully created a safe environment characterized by understanding and no-blame games. If conflicts arise, we talk over them freely and compromise with ease.
Language use in our relationship has helped me realize the gendered influence it causes in relationships. According to Adler and Proctor (2017), men and women initiate diverse conversations based on their interests. For instance, men will likely engage in conversations around sports, music, news, and current events. On the other hand, women engage in conversations touching on domestic and cosmetic issues such as food, grooming, weight, and internal design. These realities about language use apply to my relationship with my brother, where we try to maintain boundaries to foster successful relationships.
The Influence of Social Media on My Relationship
My brother and I are frequent social media users, and this has had an impact on how we relate. Although social media use has its benefits, it can also have harmful effects on relationships. One of the negative impacts of social media is that it elicits the ‘green-eyed monster of jealousy’ (Adler & Proctor, 2017). When loved ones view one another’s profile, they are likely to resort to feelings of jealousy. Among the reasons for such feelings is that social media shows the other life of a user. Loved ones are likely to become jealous once they realize that their favorite people also have a network of people besides them. As an older sister, I have always tried to guide my younger brother to prevent him from getting into trouble. Seeing him with people I do not know on social media would make me jealous; hence, I avoid frequenting his social media handles.
The dynamics of social media have also revealed why in-person conversations are more effective than social media interactions. Social media users are more likely to use foul comments when using social media platforms than in real life (Napoli, 2014). After someone gets angry and makes an insulting comment on social media, the comments stay for ages. A simple search of the user’s online activity reveals who commented what, which may affect their reputation in the future. Thus, the awareness that social media communication is impulsive influences me to avoid interacting with my brother over social media. Instead, we prefer one-on-one meetings where issues may be discussed more intimately. The attempt to avoid the downsides of social media communication has inspired me to initiate more physical meetings with my brother.
Another impact of social media on our relationship is realizing the need to protect loved ones. One of the disadvantages of social media use is cyberbullying (Das & Sahoo, 2011). When exposed to social media bullying at an early age, the bullied victims end up having low self-esteem and generally have poor mental well-being. Having realized this negative aspect of social media, I have always tried to keep my brother out of my social media spaces. Keeping my brother out of my social media platforms protects him from cyberbullying and helps him build his identity. The lesson about embracing independence extends to other life aspects, such as career and education, where I have let my brother make his choices.
My experience using social media has helped me master communication skills that will improve my relationship with my brother. First, there is a need to give another party undivided attention while conversing. Sneaking to look at the phone even for a moment while having in-person conversations is disrespectful (Adler & Proctor, 2017). I have also learned the need to keep one’s tone civil when having social media conversations. Despite the temptations to act impulsively and provide immediate responses to insulting comments, there is a need to take time and stay calm.
Conclusion
In summary, my relationship with my brother is largely successful. Having grown up in the same environment, proximity is one of the most influential factors in the relationship. Appropriate language use is one of the elements that has been used to ensure we maintain a healthy relationship. In this case, appropriate language encompasses both-sided and gender-sensitive conversations. Language also plays a crucial role in enabling conflict resolution. On the other hand, social media use also influences how our relationship manifests. Aware of the dangers social media use poses in relationships, we avoid engaging on social media and instead meet in person.
References
Adler, R. B., & Proctor, R. F. (2017). Looking out/ looking in. Thomson Higher Education.
Brower, N., & Darrington, J. (2012). Effective communication skills: Resolving conflicts.
Das, B., & Sahoo, J. S. (2011). Social networking sites–a critical analysis of its impact on personal and social life. International Journal of Business and Social Science, 2(14), 222-228.
Davis, D. (2019). Exploring narcissistic behaviors of college students and the concept of mindful communication intervention. Illinois State University.
Napoli, A. (2014). Social media use and generational identity: Issues and consequences on peer-to-peer and cross-generational relationships–an empirical study. Participations: Journal of Audience & Reception Studies, 11(2), 182-206.
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Question
You will be writing 4 – 5-page Final Relationship Paper (does not include cover page, references, etc.), double-spaced paper on a significant relationship in your life. This can be a romantic, family, or friend relationship. This can be a current or immediate past relationship. The paper is required to use APA format, must be typed, and must use two academic journal articles that you must find using the PGCC Library database.
This paper will be written/works on in steps over the span of multiple weeks. See the below table and take note of what is due each week. Each of these have an associated assignment.
In the introduction paragraph(s) of your essay:
Identify and describe the relationship you will be focusing on for this paper. This relationship should be dyadic (between you and one other person).
Provide some background details about the relationship to help the reader understand the relationship.